Funny Police Comments

The following 15 Police Comments were taken off actual police car videos around the country.

#15. “Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they’re new. They’ll stretch out after you wear them a while.”

#14. “Take your hands off the car, or I’ll make your birth certificate a worthless document.”

#13. “If you run, you’ll only go to jail tired.”

#12. “Can you run faster than 1,200 feet per second? In case you didn’t know, that is the average speed of a 9 mm bullet fired from my gun.”

#11. “So, you don’t know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?”

#10. “Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don’t think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?”

#9. “Warning? You want a warning? O.K., I’m warning you not to do that again or I’ll give you another ticket.”

#8. “The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not: Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?”

#7. “Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen…fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in monkey doo.”

#6. “Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven.”

#5. “No, sir, we don’t have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas, but now we’re allowed to write as many tickets as we want.”

#4. “Just how big were those two beers?”

#3. “In God we trust; all others we run through NCIC.”

#2. “I’m glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of yours. At least you know som eone who can post your bail.”

And……………THE BEST ONE !!!!!!!…….Drum Roll Please!!!!!!!

#1 “You didn’t think we give pretty women tickets? You’re right, we don’t.”